This is my story…a fairy tale if you like…but not one that ends Happily Ever After
Master and I met here, Twitter, just about 8 months ago. He and I played online, moved it to real life, fell in love, and were happy..so happy.
But now that journey is at an end. Circumstances beyond both our control means that our relationship has had to stop. Those of you who read my blog know how much we mean to each other, that I wear His mark..but I can no longer be His.
We’re both upset, and the love is still there, but we can not be.
I’m writing this to explain that this has fault on no sides, and if there was any way we could still be together, we would be.
And also to say this
I will be eternally grateful to Him for how He took me on my journey of self discovery, how He taught me to be me…thankful always for His love, devotion, patience and punishment…but most of all, I’m thankful for Him being Him.
As I said, there is no happy ever after to this story - but I will always be His. He may not own this body anymore, but He will have my heart for ever.
My Master, my love
So I haven’t blogged about the last time I saw Master…don’t know why really, maybe I thought you’d had enough of reading about our time together..maybe just because I wanted to revel in the memories by myself for a bit.
But there’s one thing I want to tell you about in particular.
He pulled on my collar to choke me.
Not for long, and not to the point of me passing out, but it keeps coming back to my mind over and over again…in that moment He had my life in His hands, quite literally. He could’ve kept on pulling, my wrists were bound behind me, there wasn’t much I could’ve done really…but it keeps seeping into my memory..that total power He had - how I slipped, just for a second, into subspace - nothing else mattered, nothing at all, only that I was His, in all my entirety.
People ask me what being a sub really means - well, there it is. I gave Him complete and utter control over my very breath..how much more trust could I place in Him?
I’ve been told there will be more breath play to come…and I really can’t wait. To know that He will keep me safe while we play is the most amazing feeling in the world.
Every time I think of Him pulling on my collar, my stomach flips, my heart beats just a little faster…thank you Master, for showing me just a little more of my submission xx
By its very definition, it means to give..and in my case, it means I give the whole of myself to my Master.
But the word seems to be losing its meaning on Twitter…and please don’t assume that I am holding myself up as some sort of benchmark for other subs - far from it! I know my faults, I know how much I still have to learn, how my journey is still at it’s beginning.
But one thing I know for absolute certain…the title *sub* is not a licence to whore yourself round Twitter, looking for anyone who will give you the slightest bit of attention!
All that achieves is hurt and heartache…and it diminishes what those of us who truly serve are doing.
So think what the word submission means before you go calling yourself a sub…what it really means to those of us who wear a collar…and try to understand what your actions are doing to us.